After the drag-my-ass-to-the-gym-and-do-my mile routine, I had my coffee and cream just before 5am.
I was hungry today and had a cup of the celery stir fry before 10.
Later I went out to the store to get ‘lunch’ – a pound of Boar’s Head lower sodium bologna. I ate more than a half pound around lunch.
Today I just couldn’t put out the fire – my hunger as all-consuming. We can’t blame our ol’ demon carbs here, folks – I’m in induction, remember? Your appetite is supposed to go down.
The only thing I can pin it on, other than a natural fluctation without causation – is exercise.
Here’s a wonderful article by Gary Taubes that is perfect for all you exercise-haters. It basically says that there’s no evidence that exercise helps in weight loss – and it can hurt because exercise is an appetite stimulant.
Note, however, that I am exercising despite this. See what I wrote about this last year when I first posted the article.
Anyhow – this was that type of hunger where you have food fantasies – where you imagine the plate of whatever you desire – you see it in your mind’s eye.
To me this is the most dangerous type of hunger there is – I feel it’s being expressed from deep within – not from some Freundian-crapola type of way, but from the recesses of our primitive brain – the unconscious beast we all are that resides behind our rational cerebrum, locked in by our rational mind, but still dangerous, and ready to escape if we tire or let our guard down.
Is there some nutrients I am deficient in that my body is craving? I did forget to take my vitamins twice already this week – could that be playing a role?
In the afternoon, this hunger-beast demanded the rest of the bologna – that’s a pound in an afternoon. I also had another cup of the stir fry celery. Then I had a few handfuls of macadamia nuts I keep in my drawer.
I then drank the bottle of mineral water I had – I thought that it might help eliminate the hunger, since all that food didn’t really do it.
I remained hungry for the next few hours, which is damn distracting when you know that there’s no real cellular hunger going on here – you’ve eaten enough for a day – and you are trying to do brain work that requires a clear head.
On the ride home, I ate one of the Atkins bars I have stashed in the car. I swore off them except for emergencies – I guess this was one. I wanted another, but didn’t. I also had a strong desire to stop at the local McDonalds I pass every night on the way home for some of their food-like consumables, but I didn’t.
When I finally got home, I had a large bowl of an Asian-inspired sour soup with pickled cabbage and pork ribs. Pretty darn good, but not sour enough for me – I added some malt vinegar – the kind Brits like to put on their chips (aka fries).
I also drank up another bottle of mineral water with lemon Crystal Light. I try to avoid the stuff because of the aspartame, but again, I’m really drawn to sours lately, and I understood that I had to give in to these urges somewhat, or there would be some horrible payback when the beast escapes. I had to keep him away from all the cookies that lie about, as well as the plate of pasta that my daughter didn’t eat that sat in front of me.
I finished up with some Swiss cheese and mustard. Went to bed early because I was just so tired.
The morning scale reported 207.0 – no surprises considering the day.
Update: an hour later the scale sez 205.8 – go figure.